However, I’m not always that keen on reading autobiographies of famous sports people.  That’s because I used to really like Lance Armstrong, but then I read Its Not About the Bike:  My Journey Back to Life.  It’s hard to imagine a more self-aggrandizing excuse to make money.  By page 4 I thought he was a bit of an arrogant dude.  By page 6 I was convinced he was a doper (this was before that was confirmed for me by USADA) on the basis that he felt the need in every second sentence to mention that he didn’t use drugs.   By page 10 I hated him with a virulent hatred.  I kept reading to the bitter end, hoping that he’d redeem himself throughout the course of the book.  He didn’t.

Consequently, after that experience, I haven’t read any sports people’s autobiographies for a while.  However, I kept seeing advertisements for Chrissie Wellington’s autobiography and, since I didn’t know that much about her anyway, I figured it couldn’t hurt to try it.  Specially as it was on special offer on my Kobo.  Bargain!

And do you know, it was amazing!  I loved it – she’s such an inspiration.  I knew that she was the world’s leading Ironman triathlete, and I knew she’d won repeatedly at Kona, but that was really all I knew.  As it turns out, she never intended to be an athlete.  She’d always been quite sporty, but just in the usual way.  She worked for the government for a long time and it wasn’t until she was 30 years old that she even realised that she had such talent.  She went pro that same year, giving up her job and training full time.  I thought that was FAB – that she hadn’t even realised all that latent talent that was coursing around her for 30 years!  That’s cool!  I wonder what talent I’ll discover soon …

But seriously, we all have so many excuses these days don’t we … you know, that we’re too old to start something new, or that we haven’t got the time, or that we haven’t the money.   I loved reading about Chrissie, who had loads of excuses at her fingertips (her age, she’d have to give up a successful career, that she’d have to move abroad and away from her family etc etc) but nonetheless thought fekkit and just went for it.  How inspiring’s that?!

I would really recommend reading it – it’s not only a great autobiography of Chrissie herself, but gives a good insight into the insane world of Ironman.  I’ve been fascinated by Ironman since reading Iron War (an account of the epic Ironman race in 1989 when Dave Scott and Mark Allen literally swam, cycled and ran neck-and-neck to the a few metres before the end, which I’ll review one day), so it didn’t tell me anything I didn’t know about the sport itself.  It did, however, give me an idea of the mindset of people who do something so tortuous.  Great read all round!

xxx

The kit.

Uh-huh!  It’s a shoppers paradise out there, tri-suits, wetsuits, bikes, swimsuits, goggles, caps, cycle-computers, shoes, books … there’s a whole bunch of stuff to waste my money on prepare me properly for my event.

So far I’ve managed to be relatively restrained … I figured the things I really really needed were a bike (my bike was a mountain bike with the knobbliest tyres known to mankind) and a wetsuit.  Narrowing it down again, it’s November, and only crazy people would swim outside in November in London.  Reluctantly, therefore, I’ve shelved the question of the wetsuit (although I’ve done some serious internet research … well window shopping then) and focused on the bike.

I did quite a bit of research into that too (I love the interweb!!).  I worked out I basically had three options:

1.  rent a bike for the season;

2. buy a cheaper roadbike on the basis that I might not enjoy cycling/triathlon, and then if it turned out that I did like it, I could upgrade later; or

3.  think fekkit and just buy an expensive one, on the basis that I could sell it if I didn’t like the sport in the end.

I knew I wanted to buy (no point in wasting money renting) but I did dither a bit between options 2 and 3.  However, having discovered that Evans does 0% finance – 0%!! – I was persuaded to go for option 3, and bought the most gorgeous sexy ride in the world:

Isn’t it hot?!

It weighs about as much as my little finger, has some hard-core sexy gears that change when you think about moving up or down a gear (well you do have to flick a finger in their general direction, but that’s about it), and it’s fully fitted to ME.  Yup, that’s right, my new BFF Antonio at Evans in Fulham spent six hours fitting it to me, so that everything fits like a glove.   Which is just as well, seeing as I’m built very oddly (long arms and legs, short fingers and torso) so buying an off-the-shelf bike is a bit harder than one would imagine.

The only small problem is the fact that I’m too scared to ride it …

It’s got clipless pedals … gasp.  I spent a while on the turbo trainer at Evans getting used to the clips, but I’m still petrified of going out on the road in it … I live in Zone 1!!  On an A-Road!  I did however take it to the park this morning and rode around, clipping and unclipping, stopping and starting.  Apart from the very odd looks I got (when people saw me apparently randomly stopping and starting repeatedly), it went fairly well and I didn’t fall off, though there was one moment when I unclipped on the right and then tried to put my left foot down. That didn’t really work out so well, but luckily I’ve got a very strong self-preservation instinct and managed to swap feet quickly.  Phew!

I’ll keep you posted on my training – I’m envisioning many happy hours in Battersea Park, zooming around the perimeter road.   You can’t get more beautiful than Battersea, so any excuse to spend more time there is more than welcome!

xx

I decided to sign up last week on the basis that events focus my mind and my training, and consequently the more of them the better.  Unfortunately at this end of the season, there aren’t that many races on, so I had to sign up in a bit of a rush, and I wasn’t sure what to expect.  I just knew that it was a 5k, through Battersea Park (my training ground, woohoo!) and it was in support of Movember.

Naturally I prepared really well for the run … not only have I not run more than 2.5k in the last three weeks or so (courtesy of both my and my coach’s various injuries), but I also decided to stay at a friend’s place on Saturday night, drinking champagne, eating (delicious) rubbish and generally not preparing well for any type of run whatsoever.

However clearly the run gods were smiling on me today, as we woke up to a completely unexpected stunning day here in London:

The day only got better weather-wise (albeit absolutely freezing), and I managed to find the Band Stand where it all started (how I have never seen this before, when I train in Battersea at least once or twice a week is a complete mystery to me) without too much trouble.  I did stop along the way to take this shot of Battersea Park Lake …

See?!  The weather was amazing!

The run itself was small, with only 600 participants, and was two laps of the south part of Battersea Park.  It was for all to join in, being a charity run, and was brilliantly set up with massage tents, easy-to-find baggage bags, and best of all – super, SUPER friendly people helping out.  Love that.  It was a genuine family event with loads of kids out running (so CUTE!  Until the little darlings ran faster than I did.  Not so cute …!)

I love Battersea Park and I train there all the time, so I knew what to expect terrain-wise.  However, since this was my first outdoor run since coming off my hip/IT band injury, I’d decided before that instead of focusing on speed or making a particular time, I’d have to focus on making sure my bargain-basement, £ shop reject hip was staying popped into the right place, and focusing on my posture and breathing as a whole.  The time I took was much more of a secondary consideration this time.  Especially on a course that looked like this:

Hard to feel competitive somewhere as peaceful as that.

However …. throughout the run I did notice on the second lap that I wasn’t really being caught by anyone, and I seemed to be outpacing the people in front.  I’d checked my split after the first lap and it wasn’t that impressive – 2.5k in 12.46, which was a bit slower my time in the DOathlon last week.  Like I said I wasn’t that bothered about it as long (as long as I came in under 30 minutes, obviously!), but all that posture, breathing and pushing my hip back in must’ve worked small miracles because I came out with my fastest 5k time EVER!  My HRM recorded that I did it in 23:42, which is a couple of minutes under my best time.  And I wasn’t even THAT puffed … aside from a small cardiac infarction I was fine.  Haha.

Mo Running did an absolutely amazing job – we got the medal (who enters races without medals?  Definitely the most important bit), together with a foil blanket and some kinda drink thing (didn’t have one, I detest energy drinks with a virulent hatred).

Then I got to walk back through Battersea and over to Sloane Square, so I’ll leave you with some pictures of where I get to train … anyone jealous much?!   To add insult to injury, I took all these this morning which shows again how gorgeous the weather was.

Mo Running does do another event this month – a 10k at Greenwich Park on 25 November.  I’d be in like flynn usually (whoever Flynn is, he gets involved in a lotta stuff) but I’ve got a swimming course that day so can’t make it.  I’d definitely recommend it to anyone who can make it though … even if it won’t be as gorgeous as my beloved Battersea (not that I’d be biased or anything …)

xxx

And then I realised what I’d done.

And shat my pants.

I can’t swim in the open water.  I haven’t got a road bike.  We all know what my running is like … ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH

It’s okay though, I’ve purchased some essential reading, got a training plan, signed up for a triathlon club, put a deposit down on a bike (thank you Evans Cycles for 0% interest finance), enrolled in swim school and bullied some friends into promising to take me open water swimming next year (even though they’re clearly doing it only for the entertainment value, the huge smirks on their horrible faces say everything).  I’ve also signed up to about a billion beginner triathlon websites and subscribed to 220 Triathlon magazine (5 issues for£5!  bargain!).

I’ve even got a Mr Men calendar specially set up for triathlon (and other) training in 2013.  How organised am I?!

Secretly, even though I’m petrified (especially of the cycle leg for some reason … I am not sure why but that’s the scariest bit) I’m also excited.  And petrified.  And still excited.  I’ve been really needing a challenge lately, because although I work out all the time, I’m too unfocused and I’m getting stale.  Sure, I do a 10k run every year, but I don’t even train for it so it’s hardly a challenge.  Doing the triathlon from scratch … that’s a proper challenge, one I’ll really have to work towards.

And that’s kinda fun.  In a masochistic way.

xxx

I’d love to explain that I’ve had really good reasons for being absent but actually it’s just been summer, I’ve been busy and I haven’t had anything exciting to blog about anyway.  Until today!

My gym, Virgin Active (which I have to say I do love), runs a TRYathlon and DOathlon every year (well okay, this only started last year but it’s a tradition that I hope continues).   Basically you get to pick from:

Dash distance (1.2 mtr run, 5,000 mtr cycle, 200 mtr swim)

Supreme distance (2.5 mtr run, 10,000 mtr cycle, 400 mtr swim)

Duathlon (2.5 mtr run, 10,000 mtr cycle)

The disciplines are in reverse order to a normal triathlon because of that pesky health and safety getting slightly ticklish about the idea of people running wet through their nice dry clubs.

Last year I got involved in the Dash distance on the basis that my swimming could barely uphold even that (and believe me, it was a struggle) and this year I did the Duathlon.  I almost changed to the Supreme at the last second but a lack of spare goggles in the gym sadly meant that I was back to doing my Duathlon.

And do you know, it was really hard!  As usual, l I’d “forgotten” to train (well I practised once but I got bored), and I hate the indoor cycle at the best of times.  I knew the run would be easily the best of the two disciplines but doing the disciplines in reverse meant that I had to be really careful not to spank the run and bonk on the bike (which sounds distinctly dodgy doesn’t it?!  I wish it were as fun as it sounds …).  I thought my run time was distinctly respectable, running at 12kph for 1,000 mtrs, then increasing the speed incrementally by 0.5kph every 500 mtrs so that the last 500 was run at 14 kph.  Then it was off to the bike.

Sorry I just need to say this again – I HATE the indoor bike.  Why are the seats so wide?!  Who has a bum that big?!  The rules – sadly – dictated a resistance of 4, and my overall time on the bike was 18:33.  I have to say I was a bit gutted about that … I had thought I’d get it in about 17:00 at that resistance (though I can do it at 15:00 on a resistance level of 2, my optimal resistance level).  However since at about 4,000 mtrs I was considering quitting, on another level I’m pleased with myself for sticking with it.  Once I realised I wasn’t going to make my 17:00 (which was within the first 30 seconds!!) I focused on not letting my cadence fall below 100 when pedalling normally and 90 when drinking (water, to be clear, though gin would’ve been nicer and might’ve helped me speed up) and I’m happy that I managed that at least.  So not all bad!

Obviously though, my favorite thing about it is my finisher’s medal.  ’Cause it’s awesome:

Virgin Active does make a huge effort every year – and you get a swim cap and finisher’s medal and EVERYTHING!  Sweetly, you also get your very own race number on your arm, which also correlates to your race card where all your times are recorded.  The results are also uploaded to the internet so that you can see your splits, average speed, position for each split and position overall by way of club, category and overall.  That’s pretty awesome for a free event (which incidentally is open to non-members of Virgin as well … if anyone fancies it next year …!)

Now that I’ve reviewed the results and realised that I came 215th out of 1,297 (that’s the females only, I came 440th overall) I’m not quite as gutted about the bike leg.  I still think I could’ve done better, but that’s not a bad thing – gives me motivation for next year …

Roll on the Virgin Active TRYathlon and DOathlon for 2013!

xx

I’d been a bit worried that it would be full of people who a) knew just what they were doing; and b) weren’t that keen to let two newbies hang out.  However Sarah has buckets more confidence than I do and just barrelled in … and it turned out that everyone was absolutely lovely (of course, I don’t know what I think people are going to be like!) and we had a ball.

It turned out that the group that organised it, One Element, also does training in the parks, mostly in South West London.  I loved the idea of training outside and as a Chelsea/Fulham border girl (yes I do realise how utterly poncey that sounds!), South West London couldn’t be more perfect for me.  I signed up pretty much there and then, but after a couple of tasters put my membership on hold until March because I was heading out to New Zealand for a bit.

Of course on the plane on the way back from NZ the disaster to my foot occurred (the haematoma and subsequent torn tendon and cracked metatarsals) so I didn’t end up going back until … July!!  I kept meaning to go, but life can be so crazy and besides, I wanted to go to the big one on Wandsworth Common rather than the smaller one that’s local to me, but I knew it was the main one and I was more than a bit nervous of walking into a group like that.  Not only was I petrified that they’d all be much faster and fitter than me but there’s also a big social aspect to One Element.  Whilst I love that, and it’s one of the reasons that I wanted to join it in the first place, it’s also super-scary to walk into a group that all knows each other all by yourself … well maybe that’s just me.  But I was scared!

Luckily for me, my lovely trainer is also a member of One Element, by total coincidence.  Once he heard about this ridiculous shyness, he offered to take me with him and babysit me.  I leaped at this chance  and arranged to go a couple of Wednesdays ago.

I have to say, all could not have started more badly!  My trainer warned me in advance that there was a fitness test scheduled for the day we were going, which increased my fears six-million-fold.  What if I was the only one who couldn’t do it?!  Even if I could, what if I finished last?!  What if I threw up?!  What if they laughed at me?!  George explained that you could choose to do 200, 300, 400 or 500 exercises (it’s basically nine types of exercise, and you do 20, 30, 40 or 50 of each with a 100m run in between each one, then do a 200, 300, 400 or 500 metre run at the end, depending on which level you’ve chosen to do), and that it would be timed so that basically you try and do it as fast as you could.  After seeing the blank panic in my eyes (which were saucer-shaped and glassy with fear), I’d love to say that he reassured me.  Instead, he told me that I’d be fine to do the 500s with him and that we’d race each other.  FIVE HUNDREDS!!!  In a race against my 6’4 personal trainer!!!!  I nearly pulled out there and then!

I managed to work up the courage to get down there though, and grudgingly signed up for the 500s.  George and I were the only ones mad enough to do this, but that at least gave me an excuse to come last!  As it turned out, I did the full thing in 14 minutes 6 seconds which is apparently super-fast (the spirit of competition was on me) – the exercises were actually not that bad, but the running was a killer.

Anyway, despite the fitness test and my insane fears, I actually had a really great time.  Once again everyone was lovely, and we trooped off to the pub for a beer afterwards (me still clinging slightly to George in case these people who’d been totally lovely for the last hour and a half suddenly developed fangs or turned into werewolves or something).  I have been back every week since – except last week due to prior commitments – although admittedly mostly to my much smaller local one, but partly that’s a timing issue because my local one has Saturday morning events which are easy for me to attend.  I can go as many times as I like for my membership, but to be honest with all the other stuff I do, it can only be a maximum of twice, I just don’t have time for anything more!

xxx

Initially I wasn’t that bothered about the Olympics really – not because I wasn’t interested but it always seemed so far away.  But then it crept right up on me … and I had no tickets to anything.  Gutted.

Until, that is, I got invited to day three of the eventing (ie the cross-country day) for yesterday!  So lucky!  I’ve also been invited to the Paralympics athletics on two separate days and to top it off, I got a wee booklet in the mailbox which told me that the triathlon, road racing and marathon are all going past my house!  Uh-huh!!  HA so how lucky am I?!

Actually I kinda missed the road-racing because I was away this weekend, but I avidly watched it on the telebox (and cheered randomly for my house when I saw it flashing by) and I cannot tell you how caught up I’ve become.  Isn’t it all so fab?!  I can’t stop watching it, I’d almost rather be watching exercise than doing it and that’s a first, believe me.

Yesterday I went to the cross-country eventing.  Man it was awesome!  I love horses – I have horses – but not in an English sense, seeing as we used to ride our horses down the beach wearing not much other than bikinis.  Saddles were for weirdos and as for stirrups … what’s the point?!  Much easier to cling on without!  So as you can imagine, the eventing couldn’t be much further away from what I am familiar with, horsily speaking.  However, I had the best day!  We were lucky enough to get a spot in prime position set up as our base camp, and the seven of us took it in turns to wander off and see the rest of the Park.  They’ve done such an amazing job with Greenwich Park and the course is fiendishly clever with hills and all kinds of craziness.  As you can see, we got the best of the hills from base camp:

Although when we moved to the arena we also had front row seats:

Obviously I had a few divided loyalties, since I was fully rooting for TeamGB, but also I had to put in some effort for Mark Todd, the seven-times Kiwi Olympian who is one of my all-time heroes, ever since he came to my school in New Zealand with Charisma (who, on reflection, must’ve been the most patient eventing horse on earth, since I seem to remember we all wanted to pat him and play with him … poor thing!).  Happily both did brilliantly and Mark’s currently in the running for bronze!  HOORAH!

Mostly though, I just loved the atmosphere – like the Jubilee Weekend, it was full of the most random cross-section of society, all out, all having a good time and all supporting our team.  It was fabulous – and really really rare, I hardly ever go to something where everyone’s so positive.  I loved it!

To me the Olympics isn’t really just about the medals – I mean sure, they’re cool and all, but I have so much appreciation for all the hard work the athletes have all put in (probably because I put in loads of work and I have NO chance of a medal – not just an Olympic medal, ANY medal other than a finisher’s medal!!) and for the atmosphere that they’re providing to us.   I love the medals – and how cute was Ruta Meilutyte?! – but mostly I love the fact that those dudes competing are just awesome.  And super-inspiring.

I don’t want it to be over!  Can’t we have it for 79 days like they used to?!

xxx

The thing is, I hate running.  Within seconds, I’m tomato red, my breath is coming only in screaming gasps, and I’m tomato red.  I can’t run faster than a slow jog to save my life, and for some reason my left thumb always points upwards in a strange rictus thumbs-up scenario which, frankly, must be a little scary to see.

However, I’ve always wanted to be able to run.  Partly it’s because people who can run seem to take such masochistic pleasure in it, and partly it’s because it’s good exercise to do anywhere anytime, since all you need is a pair of shoes (and in my case an iPhone with a functioning GPS system, because my ability to get lost is absolutely legendary).

Mostly though, I want to do it because I can’t.  And that annoys me.

Consequently, after two quite humiliatingly difficult and badly executed runs (the Race for Life and the Nike British 10k) I decided it was time to do something about it.  Particularly after my trainer proved to me that he could walk – walk!! – 10k in the same time as I ran it.  Now, I know that I could just buy a running book or DVD or something and just go for it, but to be honest, running is so difficult and so unnatural for me that I figured it was better to go to an expert and actually get some lessons.  After all, I ‘ve been taught literally every other sport that I play (including things like cycling and swimming which are pretty similar to running really), why should I know how to run without lessons?  I knew I had to be doing something wrong and I figured it was better to find out what.

Well – everything, as it turned out.

After about 10 steps, my trainer looked down at me and said – slightly incredulously – “Is that the way you run?”  When I pointed out that yes, I’d told him already I couldn’t run and that that was why I needed him, his answer was a (politely stifled, but still audible) giggle.  Great.

Once he’d stopped laughing though, he gently pointed out all the things I was doing wrong (feet, body angle, arms, head, back and hips) and showed me how to do them right.

Now, please don’t imagine for a second that I got them all.  It’s super-hard to think and run (well in my case it can just be super-hard to think sometimes).  However we did six intervals of running hard for a minute and recovering with a jog for two minutes, and each time I tried to correct all the nasty things I was doing hopelessly wrong.  This is hard!  It feels really weird to run in a style that is new, especially when you’ve been doing it soooo wrong that you have to correct everything.  On top of that, I’m super-visual so without being able to see myself, I can’t necessarily feel what I’m doing and whether I’m actually following instructions, or just looking slightly mentally deficient.  Probably a bit of both, with a weighting towards the latter I suspect!

However by the end of the session (and forgetting different things every time I ran … apparently I can think about my arms OR my legs) I have to say it was loads easier.  LOADS!  I can’t imagine why I haven’t learned this before!  At the start, we did some intervals, and in the first 60-second high intensity interval, my heart-rate shot up to 178 and I couldn’t even jog at the end of the minute – I had to stop altogether and then (after practically being pushed) just about managed a slow jog.  At one point during a recovery jog, a one-year-old baby joined in with us.  He beat me.

However by the sixth interval, when I’d sort of vaguely gotten the point and started to change my style (and I do use the term “style” extremely loosely) my heart rate was down at 160 and I wasn’t praying for the end of the minute to come.  As much.  So it turns out that this whole technique business really does pay off!

The thing is, I still kinda hated it.  We did sprint races at the end and even though my trainer gave me a 50% head start(!) he still beat me in every race apart from one, and I thought my lungs might actually explode.  My legs weren’t that happy either!

But the other thing is … I also loved it.  The very last sprint, I finally kinda got it and it felt amazing (that’s the one race I beat my trainer in, although I have a sneaking suspicion he might’ve let me win).  I know I’m a terrible runner (for now, I have every faith in my trainer – he’s amazing and if anyone can make me do it, I know it will be him) but even after one lesson I could feel myself getting better.  And that felt AWESOME.

To be totally honest, I also kinda loved it BECAUSE I hated it.  I like that feeling of pushing myself as hard as I can.  Looking back, I think I probably held back a bit yesterday until the sprints because I didn’t know quite how much horror lay before me(!) but from now on, the challenge is on!  An hour a week (plus three practice sessions between) of making myself reach my absolute limit.  And I can’t WAIT.

I’ll leave you with a picture of me after I’ve had a few more lessons.

xxx

One of the trips I went on was to Norfolk for my friend Nicky’s hen party.  We hired a cottage in Suffield Common, one of the most remote places that this lil City-dweller’s ever been.  Apart from my total terror of driving down the Postman Pat-type lanes (which weren’t even wide enough for just my Mini but were somehow two-way?!), I had an amazing time … which was just as well given that on the basis that why have just a hen weekend when you can have a hen week, we spent five days up in Suffield.

Since there were only a couple of weeks to go before the Nike 10k, one might’ve thought that I would’ve focused on running while I was up there – after all, running is my default exercise while away, and Norfolk is dead flat with some beautiful scenery.

However, why be normal?!  Instead I did a lot of tabata and resistance work.

In part, that was because I had been doing a lot of that with my trainer anyway, so it kind of fitted in with my plan for the week.  However it was also because I wanted to see what other things apart from the everlasting running I could actually do outside the gym.  I found the perfect work-out spot just down the road from our cottage:

It was just like it’s own mini-gym!  The gate was perfect for dips, the grass for push-ups, sit-ups, reverse-crunches, mason twists, starjumps and mountain-climbers, and the two iron things were great for doing bunny hops over.  I spent a lot of time doing tabatas on them, trying to do eight blocks of each thing.  Tough stuff!!

I did of course do a couple of runs, but they were really just for warm-up, being only about 3k each.  I always meant to do a longer run, but I was just so pleased with my mini-outdoor natural gym that I was drawn back to it every day!

However I’m pleased that I did at least toddle out a little bit because I found this amazing church, called St Mary Antioch.  Isn’t it pretty?

I wouldn’t've seen it without running, so that was a bonus.  YAY!

One thing I do wish I’d been able to do was run by the sea.  I didn’t get a chance in Norfolk because the only time we were out to the coast we were doing a specific trip, and after that the Great British Summer kicked in in force and it wasn’t worth going back.  However, just to prove that we have amazing beaches right here in the lil ole UK, check this out!

Yup, uh-huh!  That’s the Norfolk coast.  Pretty huh?

xxx

Every year, without fail, I “forget” to train … and every year, on the day, I moan, groan and swear I’m never doing it again.  Yet somehow the following year, there I am again, forgetting to train, moaning and groaning.

It all started off in 2008 when my friend Louise, who has very close personal connections with the MS Trust, suggested that we do this 10k run through central London to raise money for the charity.  I have absolutely no idea why I agreed, since at the time fitness was an entirely remote concept to me and I don’t think I’d run further than the bus-stop (which is precisely two metres from my front door) since prep school.  However for some reason (probably anxious not to look like the fat one who couldn’t do it) I agreed and signed up with her.

That year it was just the two of us, and I had no idea what to expect.  I knew that the run went through central London, starting at Hyde Park Corner, tootling down Piccadilly and through Trafalgar Square onto the Embankment, through the Blackfriars Tunnels and back along the Embankment, then wending its way over Westminster Bridge past Big Ben and the Palace of Westminster before heading through Parliament Square (and of course Westminster Abbey), down towards Victoria and then back up to finish on Pall Mall.   Therefore I knew at least that it was an absolutely beautiful course.

However, what I didn’t expect was the atmosphere.  Loads of people moan about the British 10k on the basis that there are too many people, and it’s horribly organised (no waves and, up til this year, no chip timing) but to be honest, that’s not what it’s about.  To me, it’s about getting to run through central London in no traffic with an amazing atmosphere – there are 25,000 people running, with marching bands at the start and a speech from the Lord Mayor, plus you get to sing the National Anthem before you start.  I think that’s cool.  It makes me feel like a real athlete since it’s usually only in proper races that you get to do that.

As well as the 25,000 (and believe me, that’s a lot of people …)

there are some of the most serious players in the field running (think Mo Farah and Paula Radcliffe) joining in.  It also draws a huge number of spectators, from charity personnel (you can run for any charity you like, so there are always some very touching stories, or you can run as an individual paying runner) to friends and family, all providing support and praise to you throughout the entire course which gives the whole thing an amazing vibe.

The only small problem is that you actually do have to transport yourself 10k …!  Running or walking, it’s not that short a distance.  Especially if you don’t train …

The first year Louise and I did it more or less together and I think we finished in something like 1 hour 10 – and we were so proud, bwahahah!  To be fair, I at least damn well should’ve been proud, since that was the first year (in what has now become a long tradition) of me, err, forgetting to train.  Consequently before the day itself, I think I’d been out for one run of 3.7k!  How I didn’t die is a mystery to me …

The following year, 2009, Louise’s family joined in – two sisters and cousin Steph.  Louise and Steph were both quite keen runners then – I think I did it in 64 minutes and was the second slowest.  Needless to say, I wasn’t that happy about it …

2010 was the biggest group of us doing the run, since Louise roped in a bunch of her work-mates as well as family, and we formed two charity-fund-raising teams.  We also got pressganged into wearing the following highly attractive outfits.  I can’t imagine why I don’t wear this all the time to train … let alone Lindsay, he looks super-fetching in it.

Although once again I didn’t train in 2010, I was about three weeks off finishing my first round of P90X, so that year I managed to come near the top of our group in 60 minutes even.  The only three to beat me where Steph and Louise, who’d both been training all year and had done a couple of half-marathons, and Lindsay,  Louise’s dad who was formerly an All Blacks rugby coach.

As you can see, I wasn’t too disappointed with that …

However, it was 2011 when things really started to change for me.  Funnily enough – you’ll be surprised to hear – I seem to remember that I did four training runs that year, which is about four more than I’d ever done before.  Clearly training is the key, because despite having been beaten by all three of them the year before, I killed both my previous time and Steph, Louise and Lindsay in a time of 56 minutes.

In 2012, the others all decided not to run for a variety of reasons.  However, I felt kinda guilty not doing it, so I entered as a paying runner rather than a charity runner so that I could avoid having to beg, borrow and steal any more cash from my friends.  Two weeks before the race, I promptly did a reversy on that, having been super-touched by a story I heard about someone who’d been really helped out by Headway, the charity which helps those with acquired brain injuries and their families.  I managed to raise just under £500 for Headway in ten days, which I was really pleased with as it’s an amazing charity.  The one thing I still didn’t do, however, was train …!

And it showed.

Despite the fact that I am undoubtedly significantly fitter than I have been previously – and certainly more than last year – I only managed a time of 59 minutes, three minutes slower than last year and four minutes slower than my target time of 55 minutes.  I can probably account for one of those minutes by virtue of the fact that this year was freezing, cold and wet and I fell in the seventh k which meant that I went more slowly for a bit.  However it’s still a backwards step … which never makes me happy.  To top it off, my trainer demonstrated that he can walk at 10k an hour which kinda showed the minimal effort I put in right?!

It’s funny how things change – the first year I was delighted with my time of 1 hour 10, nearly quarter of an hour slower than my best time.  This year I had the second-best time of all of my times to date – yet I was gutted with my time and mortified when telling all my lovely sponsors how I’d done.

One good thing about it though – I’m so determined to do a proper time next year (and by proper, I really mean sub-50) that I’ve got a proper real training plan and everything.  Yup, uh-huh!  And I’m going to start training now (I had to look into techniques, methods etc and work out which I thought was the best for me before I started – I do like to have a good plan in place that I can stick to, or I go a bit wild and woolly and resemble Taz!).

So … bring on next year when I will earn a medal I’m really proud of!

xxx